My dear Jackie died last month. Her son called to tell me. Her funeral was held in Oklahoma City on August 24, which happens to be Keith’s birthday and my mother’s birthday. Jackie was 96 years old.

Jackie was my second mother. She was one of the black women who began working for my family when I was around six years old.  She is the lady who knew the real me, and she basically raised me. My parents traveled a lot and loved being social. Jackie was the one who picked me up from school, took me to the tutor; she cooked and bathed me, taught me about life and love. I loved her so much, as I write this I can still smell her scent, and her chewing gum. I would hug and kiss her and sit on her lap. I have even shared a bed with her.

Anna, my dear cousin, was my partner in crime growing up. Jackie would take us out to fun restaurants and shopping centers.  When my parents were out of town, Jackie would sit and watch us mimic Sonny and Cher; we would sing our hearts out into the wee hours of the morning.  At times Jackie would retreat into the kitchen while the loud music was being played, and smoke her cigarettes and play solitaire. She had been known to share a glass of wine or two with Anna and me. She would prepare our family dinners and was always there helping with the meals for the holidays.

There were some fun and sad times.  I remember Jackie taking Anna and me to her Baptist Church for a Sunday service. It was quite the experience; I had never witnessed people jumping up and down in church and screaming praises to the Lord like he was just next door.  Another time, Jackie had taken me to a Mexican diner when I was in my teens and a bit boy crazy. There we were in line getting our food, Jackie had a huge glass of Coke, and I swung my head around to look at some boy and flipped my long hair, and there went the Coke and food flying everywhere. The coke was in her purse and all over her. She was so upset, she would not sit with me, and I kept apologizing, but she would have nothing to do with me. She even asked the waiter for an aspirin.  After sending me to my room when we got home, she forgave me several hours later.

While I was in boarding school in California, my mom was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer. I would talk with Jackie on a daily basis. I remember her advising me to come home because my mom was having surgery, and that I would not recognize her. Jackie met me at the airport and we went directly to the hospital and I was shocked when I saw my mother. Jackie was with my mom on a daily basis when she became so ill; my dad would go to work and she witnessed all of the pain. My mom collapsed one time when my father was swimming in the pool. She yelled out to him to get out, as she had picked her up off the floor. The ambulance came and Jackie rode with her to the hospital.  Jackie was at my mother’s side when she died,   Unfortunately, I was flying home at that moment.  Jackie shared a very special moment with my mom as she took her last breath: Jackie asked  her if she would accept Jesus as her lord and savior, my mom replied yes.  Jackie was very spiritual and loved her church and her God.

Jackie was a part of our family. My mother would sit for hours and talk with her about everything. My dad loved her also, always treating her with respect. She referred to my mom as “Little Miss” and called my dad “Peeps”!  All of our close friends loved her and she welcomed everyone with a hug and a smile.

After my mother died, our family dedicated” A Tree of Life ” in memory of my mom at the hospital where she died.  Jackie was at the dedication with our family, I can still look in the photo album and see her picture.

The last time I saw Jackie was when she celebrated her 90th birthday back in Oklahoma City. Ginny Sharkey, my dear friend, and Keith, my wonderful husband, and I flew back for her party.  Anna, my dear cousin, went with us, and Jackie’s family was there. It was just like being with family. Jackie was so glad to see us, we reminisced about all the fun we had and how I would always be her baby. That is where I first tried a dump cake, and to this day love it!  As we drove away from her house, I broke down and cried, knowing I would never see her again.  I can still hear her talking to me, and her laugh. Jackie was a gift from God to me, I know she is with the angels in heaven and looking down on me. I am sure at times she is shaking her head, saying be a good girl!